Staring into the window of soul

She was leaving forever, yet I couldn't make myself look at her as she silently closed the door and walked out on me for good. I was standing near the window, all alone. It was raining outside, I could see her walking down the porch and into the rain, but just as she was stepping into the rain she turned back, our eyes met and I could hear them accusing me for all the lost dreams and never realized wishes. All I could do was stand there and stare at her like a coward that I was, she turned and walked away never looking back again. I was still there, standing by the window watching her walk into the night, to never come back again. It was my fault really, that she walked out on me, I was too egoistical to apologize when I had the time. Now that she is gone I am nothing but a shallow heart which cannot feel a thing. She was the spirit, the soul that was once me and without her I am nothing but a empty shell of bones and flesh.

Now when I think of it I realize she was the shimmering hope of happiness and the smile that never failed me when I was low. Even when I failed her she was always there to cheer me up. Without her by my side I will become a shadow in the darkness with no one to rescue me out of it and into light. Here I am still standing near the window wondering, when did I become so self implicated and caught up in my own ego that I dint even realize that my soul was tearing away from me to walk away forever taking with her the happiness and smile that once was mine.